Recovery is slow but promised

I looked at my last post, some time in September 2009. Things happened, my mind couldn't form words together to print. Then two days before Thanksgiving, my brother killed himself. Wednesday before Thanksgiving I cooked, Thursday - Thanksgiving I held hands around a table full of food thanking God for the ones I love and have loved in my life. Friday I traveled across the US to my brother's home. I met my only living sibling left, my little sister. We began the emotionally and physically draining tasks of clearing out my brother's belongings, setting up a memorial service and consoling his young daughter.

The busy-ness of tragedies have robbed me of necessary mourning and processing death. My little sister and I traveled to do the same thing when our sister died in 2003; leaving behind three children. Both siblings were single parents.

So, 6 months later I am just beginning to process...process what, I don't know. I feel the gravel working it's way out of my tissue to the top of my skin like horrible road rash has a way of doing.

I'm not in despair but often times feel like I am just looming around. Writing has always been my friend and often times I find God's words this way.

I'm on my way to a productive, one foot in front of the other type day. For anyone that reads this I hope you gain hope in knowing recovery may be slow but it is a promise I hold dear to; I hope you can too.